Wednesday, January 28, 2015

And then Stuff Happened: How to Figure out the Middle

Hello humanoids. Have you ever started writing something absolutely brilliant and get a few chapters into it and then realize you have no idea what to happen next? You have an idea for the ending and you've written the beginning but you have no middle. This problem happens to me often. Its annoying. Over the years I've figured out how to fix it. My suggestions may not work for you but they might help.

1. Make an outline. This is something I hate doing. I find outlining boring and I rarely end up using it but sometimes it can help. If you like planning it might do wonders for you. Even if you don't end up using the outline it'll at least give you ideas for a middle.

2. Ask yourself, does the beginning work? Do I really want it to end that way? How many Red Hots can I stick in my mouth at one time? That last question isn't really necessary. Sometimes when you write you need to rewrite. Maybe your beginning is the problem. Maybe you need to change something. Reread what you've written so far and see if there's anything that should be fixed. If you change somethings you'll get ideas for your middle.

3. Be evil. Grab a piece of paper or open a new document and just write down awful things that you could do to your characters. Figure out what obstacles you could give them to make their goal harder. Don't be afraid to hurt your characters. Maybe getting shot in the leg forces your main character to go to an underground city to get help where they run into their evil twin. You don't have to use everything you write down. I definitely don't. I'm never going to have my characters get abducted by aliens, drowned in coffee, and then revived by a group of magical bunnies. I have used some of it though, such as the main character getting arrested (she totally had it coming. I'm amazed she went as long as she did without getting caught) or finding out their best friend is an assassin. Have fun with this. You never know what might happen.

4. Do you need to just shelf this idea? Sometimes that does happen. Its happened to me several times. You may not want to put away this idea but it might be for the best. Maybe you'll get a new and better idea. Maybe one day you'll return to it and know exactly what you need to change. Or maybe you just need to take a break from this idea for a little while. So if you've been struggling with this for a long time maybe it is time to move on. Find a new idea. You never know, your next idea might be the one you publish.

Hopefully one of those helps you. If not I'm sure that if you watch cat videos long enough you'll get a brilliant idea to fix everything. This is all I have to say for today. Hope all you readers have a great day. Good bye, humanoids.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Personality Quiz of Doom!!!!

Ever asked yourself "if I was one of Katie Rose's characters who would I be?"? Well, today you can answer that question. I created a quiz thingy because of boredom! So, who are you?

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

The Last of the Unicorns

Unicorns, the most endangered animals still alive. Only a few still live in the wilds today. We’ve hunted them down, murdered them. Those who we don’t kill we imprison and throw away the key. We are the reason most people don’t believe that unicorns exist.

Hundreds of years ago knights hunted unicorns for sport. They existed in large numbers back then. You could take a stroll through the forest and spot one. But back then if you saw one you’d probably try to kill it. Unicorn horns were worth a great deal. Murder one of the beautiful creatures and you’ll have money to feed your family for months.

Very few unicorns live in the wilds. Actually, there probably aren’t any still living in the forests of the British Isles today are we are the only ones to blame for such a crime. As far as I know all the unicorns we still have yet to murder live in Scotland. They live in labs. We experiment on them, torture them. We do it in the name of science, forgetting that they are living breathing creatures. Not
all unicorns live in labs though. Some of them have been imprisoned by the rich for their zoos. They live out their lives in cages, never having the chance to gallop through the forests.

Everyone loves horses and ponies. There are a lot of people who own horses. But we forget about the unicorns. We have stopped believing they exist. That isn’t true. They are real. They do exist. We just refuse to believe it. We’re fine with our horses, we no longer care about their majestic cousins.We don’t care what the scientist of Scotland do to the unicorns. We do nothing to stop the violence against the magical creatures.

After reading all that you probably still don’t believe in unicorns. You think this is just the ramblings of a crazy person. But some of you might believe again. You might feel sorry for all that has happened to the unicorns. You want to help them but you don’t know how. Well, by donating five dollars to you can save a unicorn. You can be a hero.

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

I'm a Unicorn Now

Yes, you read the title right. I'm a unicorn. How am I an unicorn you ask? Remember that time I told you I was a Time Lord? Well, I broke my neck while playing broom ball and regenerated into a humanoid unicorn. It's kind of weird.

This is what I look like now

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

The Ghost of Christmas- A Christmas Carol Retelling

Merry Christmas humanoids! As a Christmas present to all you wonderful readers of this amazing blog I've written a retelling of A Christmas Carol using characters from my story.

Derek Knight
The sights lined up with my target. Male, twenty-eight, soldier. He sat in a recliner, his four year old son playing with cars in front of him. A Christmas tree sat in the corner of the room.
I readjusted my position and put my sights on his wife, making a gingerbread house in the kitchen with their six year old daughter. They looked so happy, oblivious of the danger they were in. Their Christmas was about to take a turn for the worse.
I aimed at the man again. My finger hovered over the trigger.
“I wouldn’t suggest pulling that trigger, Killer,” a voice said.
I reached for the pistol laying next to the rifle.
“I don’t suggestion doing that either,” the voice said. “Might end up with you being dead.”
My hand clamped around the grip. I turned to the source of the voice. A teenager in his late teens with messy blond hair sat on top of a crate.
“Who are you?” I asked.
“I’m the Ghost of Christmas Past,” he grinned. “But you can call me Landon. It’s a bit shorter.”
I snorted. “Ghost of Christmas Past? Seriously?”
“You’re called Phantom,” Landon said.
“The media calls me Phantom,” I said. “I don’t really care for the name that much. I prefer Ghost.”
“Yeah, whatever,” Landon jumped down from the crate. “I want to be done with this in time for dinner so we might as well get it over with.”
“Get what over with?” I asked.
Landon grabbed me by arm with one hand and held the other in the air. “Let us go back to the past!”
The world around me warped. The world spun like a top. When everything stopped moving I puked on Landon’s nice sneakers.
“Oh, come on, man,” Landon shook his foot and the puke vanished. “That’s gross.”
I wiped my mouth and looked around. “Wait a sec, this is….”
“The Knight Penthouse?” Landon said. “I know. I brought us here with my amazing magical powers.”
“But it was torn down,” I said.
Landon nodded. “I know. It’s December 4th, 3005, before your father blew it up.”
The smell of fresh sugar cookies came drifted through the room.
I grinned and headed down the hall into the kitchen. My jaw dropped when I entered.
A woman with fiery red hair stood in the kitchen with a pan of cookies.
“Mom….” I whispered.
“Can I please have one now?” a twelve year boy asked. “Please?”
“No, kiddo,” Mom put the pan by the window. “You have to wait till after they’re decorated.”
“Can we decorate them now?” the boy asked.
A redheaded girl sighed. “If you put frosting on now it’ll melt, stultus.”
Mom gave the girl a stern look. “Derek is not stupid, Sky.”
“But he doesn’t even know what an imaginary number is,” Sky said.
I smiled. Sky, the only girl in the world who could do complex algebra at eight.
“You have a weird family,” Landon said.
I nodded. “Why did you bring me here?”
“To remind you what your Christmas’s used to be like,” Landon said. “You don’t want to take this away from that family, do you?”
“This is about my target?” I asked. “Seriously?”
Landon nodded. “Kill that man and you ruin his kid’s Christmas forever.”
I shrugged. “They’ll get over it.”
Landon sighed. “I did not want to do this.” He snapped his fingers and the scene changed.
We stood in the living room of my old house. The one I moved into after it happened.
My father sat on the couch with a bottle in his hands.
“Dad, why can’t we have a tree?” the boy from before was there. He was fifteen now.
“No,” Father said.
“But it’s Christmas!” the boy said.
Father glared at the boy. “I really don’t care. Now go do your homework or something.”
“I don’t have any,” the boy said. “Can I make cookies with Sky?”
“Get out of my sight, boy!” Father raised his hand as if he was going to hit the boy.
The boy backed away. “Okay, Father.” He walked away.
I turned to Landon. “If your plan is to show me Christmas’s of my past till I decide not to do the job its not going to work. This isn’t going to make me change my mind.”
Landon sighed. “You are stubborn.” Landon grabbed my arm and the world changed. We appeared back on the rooftop.
“I’ll leave the others to deal with you,” Landon vanished.
“Others?” I asked. “What others?”
Another person appeared before me. This one was wearing a graphic t-shirt and ripped jeans. “Hey there, Derek. I’m Tracy, AKA the Ghost of Christmas Present!”
I sighed. “Another one?”
Tracy grabbed my arm. “Don’t worry, I’ll be quick about this.”
The world exploded and the next thing I knew I was standing in my target’s living room.
“See, they’re have a splendid Christmas,” Tracy gestured to the target, who was now playing with his son.
“So what?” I asked. “I could’ve watched this through my scope.”
“You want to leave this boy fatherless?” Tracy asked. “His name is Troy. He wants to be a soldier like his father when he grows up. Do you want to ruin his life?”
“I really do not care,” I said. “Anything else you want to show me or can I get back to work?”
Tracy sighed. “You’re a heartless human being, ya know?”
“If I had a dime for everytime someone said that to me,” I muttered.
Tracy grabbed my arm and the world exploded and once again I was on the roof.
“I’ll let the next guy convince you to change your ways,” Tracy snapped his fingers and vanished.
Another one is coming? This has got to be a dream.
The world around me faded to black. A moment later I found myself standing in a graveyard.
A mist swirled around the tombstones. Storm clouds covered the sky. A man in a worn out black cloak stood a short distance away.
I made my way towards the man. I noticed the names on many of the tombstones as I past them. Amelia, Sam, Bandit, Jack, Elizabeth, Wynter. The names went on and on. None of them were the names of people I knew.
“Are you the Ghost of Christmas Future?” I stood just behind the man.
He nodded.
“Why are we here?” I asked.
“These are the graves of those I’ve killed,” he didn’t look at me. He just stared off into the distance.
The graveyard seem to go on forever. There was no end.
“You’ve killed a lot of people,” I said.
He nodded.
One of the gravestone caught my eye. Skylar Knight 2998-3014.
“Sky….” I whispered. “You killed Sky….”
The man turned to me but said nothing. His face hidden in the shadows of his hood.
“Who are you?” I asked.
He didn’t answer.
“Who are you?!”
He reached up and pulled off his hood.
I staggered back, tripping over a tombstone. “No… No. No. No.” I backed away from him. “You… I… no.”
The face staring down at me was my own. Covered with scars but it was still me.
“This can’t be real,” I said.
“We murder hundreds,” the man’s voice was like my own. “We enjoyed it.”
I shook my head. “You are not me. I’d never kill Sky.”
“She thought we were weak,” he laughed. “But she was wrong. We are not weak. We are power. We are unstoppable.”
I shook my head. “No. You are a monster.”
“We are a monster,” he said. “We are the same person. We are Derek Knight.”
“No, we are not,” I said.
“I am your future,” he laughed as the world around me faded into darkness.

I sat up. Sweat dripped from my brow. My heart pounded. The alarm clock blared. It was time to do the job.
Taking a few deep breaths, I reached for my rifle.
“I am your future.” No. It was just a dream. A nightmare. That wasn’t my future. I wasn’t going to become a psychopath. I’d never hurt Sky. It was just a nightmare, that’s all. Or was it?
The rifle leaned against the wall. It had killed so many people. I had killed so many people. It never really bothered me before now. Am I already a psychopath?
No. I’m not. I’m just a man who kills for a living, that’s all. I grabbed my rifle.
Christmas music played nearby. Do I really want to kill a father on Christmas Eve though? Do I want his kids to go through the same thing I had?
I put the rifle away. I can decide what I want to do later but my target can live. I wasn’t getting paid much for the job anyways.

Monday, December 8, 2014

The Name Game

Writing is hard. That'll never change. Naming characters is hard as well but there is an easier way to do it other than just staring at a blank page hoping the name will jump out at you. Many people have many different way to find names for their characters. I personally use baby name sites. That's how I've gotten names like Skylar Knight and Tracy Quinn. Other people may Google names from other nations and use those. There are many ways to find names for your characters and I'm going to go over a few of them today.

Now, I mentioned in the previous paragraph that I use baby name sites. They're quite useful if you want a relatively normal name. Simply Google something such as boy names and hundreds of baby name sites will pop up. Just look through some of their lists until you find a name that fits. 

Another way to find the perfect name for that character is to translate common words into different languages. Doing this is a great way to come up with fantasy names. For an example, if you translate the word assassination into Latin you'll get Caedis. You can do this with just about any language and get rather interesting results. 

You could also put sounds together to create a new word. This also works great for creating fantasy names. An example of this would be Kaltinca, which is a name I just created combining the sounds Kal-tin-ca. If you do this to create a name Google it to make sure it doesn't mean anything weird. 

Another option for naming your characters is to Google names that mean a particular thing. Such as if you Google names that mean strong you'll get names such as: Arnold, Bree, and Kari. 

So, there are four wonderful ways to find a name for that pesky character who refuses to tell you his/her name. So, that's all for now folks! Have a wonderful day. 

Friday, December 5, 2014

An Interview with Alexis Raven

Hello humanoids! Today is the day I talk about my amazing characters and ask you questions in order to get comments! Or I gues I coud just mespel stuf and use ImprOper caPitaliZatioN and pun'ctu)at:ion. Okay, that last sentence was a pain to write. I'm never ever doing that again. Anyways, for the interview I'm going to give you a quick overview of Alexis and you give me your questions. I'll post her answers on Tuesday. Oh, and here's what she looks like.

Michaela Conlin just happens to be a clone of Alexis

Alexis Raven is the twenty year old stepdaughter of Master Zane Raven of the Raven Guild. Since the Raven Guild is a thieve's guild and Alexis is a member of the guild you can rightly assume that she's a thief. Alexis is actually a pretty accomplished thief for her age. She got her first tattoos at the young age of fifteen (tattoos play a huge part in the guild's culture).

Personality wise Alexis is a very sarcastic human being. She also tends to be a little rude and has a bad habit of insulting people. Despite all this she loves people and enjoys making friends. Alexis is also very superstitious. 

Alexis may like making friends but its hard for her to keep them. Most people don't trust thieves. She does have one good friend though. His name is Ghost and he's a professional assassin. 

Alexis has a large family. Her father, who was her stepfather's brother, died when she was very young and her mother married Master Zane a year later. Alexis has two younger sisters and four half brothers. She also has several cousins, uncles, and aunts. Most of whom hate her due to the fact that she got herself kidnapped and was forced to join the rebels. 

As I mentioned in the last paragraph Alexis was kidnapped and forced to join the rebels, or the Freeland Republic as they like to call themselves. The Starrin Empire kidnapped five people for a job and attached little electronic devices to their spine so that they could electrocute them to death if they didn't do the job. Alexis currently is working for the rebels on the Empire's orders. And that last sentence sounded like it was from Star Wars. *starts talking to myself about what to change the Empire's name to*

Hope that all made sense. I'm not particularly good at summarizing people's lives. Or summarizing anything for that matter. So, if you have any questions for the lovely thief put them in the comments. She'll be answering them on Tuesday. Hope ya'll have a great day!